In 1998, a zookeeper in Oklahoma City was mauled and had an arm severed after opening the door to a female tapir's enclosure to push food inside (the tapir's two-month-old baby also occupied the cage at the time).
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These guys have giant penises. Why aren't they more popular in furry porn? They're basically built to be fat ugly bastards
Their pokemon versions are.
I have never realized that drowzee was a tapir
Drowzee is based on Baku, demons that eats dreams.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baku_%28mythology%29
How the frick did they end up in South East Asia AND South America?
they went extinct in north america and europe
This. Tapirs actually began in North America. They were still there until humans got here about 12,000 years ago.
Tapirs always came off as pea-brained and stupidly reactively violent looking to me, kinda similar to how rhinos are. I'd stay the frick away from them.
could we farm them for their cum? imagine a tall cold glass of pige juice for breakfast every morning.
hehe pige
What the hell?? Fish pigs???? How long can they keep that up for?
Long pige
Pakicetus vibes.
Wtf is going?
idk i thought it was a mating press at first
The dick is shooting up to the right. Tapir head is on the left
Is that its erect dick? How the hell does it walk like that?
It's not easy, I should know, but once you get used to it well, you know how it is...
They don't walk well. Their dick literally drags through the dirt and they frick the female with a dirt caked dick. Oh evolution, you rascal.
Tapirs have this inherent smugness about them
Like they know something you wish they didn't
Bro has a mohawk. Frickers like that are always smug about something.
Look at this gormless fool. Right here. Not even a proper trunk.
The more I look at these things the more I realise they are just elephants crossed with pandas
But somehow worse than both
Pige
>tapir thread
>le FEMOIDS
>le israeliteS
I fricking hate you wienersuckers so much.
Many such cases. It happened with the bear tape thread and ancient human threads in recent memory aswell. I at this think its just away to derail shit threads or its one or two schizos who can't stick to the topic of animals and nature. I honestly prefer the vegan shitposting at this point because atleast it was bipartisan.
there will never be another cat/dog thread where there won't be some homosexual screeching about toxo/dogfricking in the first 5 posts. it doesn't help that the mods keep up these blatant troll posts and then will have the gall to ban you while saying "the quality of posts is important to this community"
vegan posting is never preferable
ever
>tapir
I think I finally found out what animal a israelite would reincarnate as.
>long grudges too
Well have I got news for you anon.
>Hide post
>*click*
It's amazing how genuinely unfunny urban dictionary is
>SEX
>HEY LOOK GUYS SEX
>SEX BUT ITS GROSS AND HAS TO DO WITH SHIT OR PISS OR FROZEN CONDOMS
>WHY AREN'T YOU GUYS LAUGHING?!?!?
Well, clearly some people find it funny if the site is still around. I (mostly) agree though
This entire website is /misc/, you didn’t even bother trying to refute what he said
>This entire website is /misc/, you didn’t even bother trying to refute what he said
Because I don't want to debate gendershit on Wauf Black person
I mean me neither but at that point just ignore it lol
>you didn’t even bother trying to refute what he said
there wasn't anything to refute lmao. he just moved the goalposts when he got BTFO for saying men never get injured handling animals
just take the L and move on incel, you've gotten BTFO enough for one thread. save your crying about women for /LULZ/
>women die more
>SO YURSAYIN MEN ARE PERFECT HUH? THEY ARENT. I WIN NO ONE WILL EVER HAVE SEX WIT YU.
I see. So you are a woman.
May i interest you in a job working with tigers?
>he just moved the goalposts when he got BTFO for saying men never get injured handling animals
I didn't post the male keeper deaths. Stop shadow boxing lol
>I didn't post the male keeper deaths.
no fricking shit you didn't? someone else did, you got BTFO and backpedaled as described here
. i've seen incels like you get wrecked like this many a time my man.
Wrong again moron. I was here
here
and here
.
I know a guy who is genuinely proud that he has two words "officially" on the urban dictionary, I forgot what they were but he reminds me every time I see him.
It should be kept in mind this was a woman. It's always a woman. You'll notice men don't get killed by zoo animals all the fricking time because they tend to know what the frick they're doing. Every time I hear one of these stories it's ALWAYS a woman.
the tapir had her kid nearby and felt threatened
This wouldn't have happened to a man. At best the tapir would have gotten off some scratches. Women have absolutely no control of their bodies. You can see this in women's reaction to shitbull attacks vs men's. A man will just pick the Black persondog up and pile drive it into oblivion. Women dance around waving their hands hoping the carnage will stop or a man will come along to put a stop to it.
>Women have absolutely no control of their bodies. You can see this in women's reaction to shitbull attacks vs men's
I used to get confused when people called me a /misc/tard when in shitbull threads talking about how dangerous they are. But with anons like this I am starting to see why. How the frick is any of this relevant to Tapirs? Has this been on your mind for awhile or something?
It’s in the OP, a woman zookeeper was mauled and lost an arm
Its not in the OP, but the keeper was female.
>when people called me a /misc/tard when in shitbull threads talking about how dangerous they are.
Not him but those people are definitely moronic and just mad because they know it relates to another dangerous group they love to shill for, very funny cognitive dissonance going on
?
>You'll notice men don't get killed by zoo animals all the fricking time because they tend to know what the frick they're doing. Every time I hear one of these stories it's ALWAYS a woman.
So you've heard exactly one? Because...
https://www.standard.co.uk/news/world/zookeeper-mauled-death-lion-japan-kenichi-kato-b1110251.html
>2023, male zookeeper mauled to death by tiger
https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/mauling-victim-grandad-of-his-big-cats/SWPMI4JXJJDP77FEW2ISUUNODI/
>2009, experienced male big cat handler mauled to death by the lions he'd raised
https://www.latimes.com/archives/blogs/la-unleashed/story/2008-10-31/liger-attack-victim-dies-from-wounds-in-oklahoma
>2008, animal handler was mauled by a liger and died in hospital
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12877273/Zookeeper-attacked-killed-hippo-entering-new-enclosure-clean-India.html
>2023, male zookeeper is attacked and killed by a hippo in it's enclosure
I think you're just a seething schizophrenic and have to make shit up to justify your thought patterns rather than basing your thought patterns on reality. Many such cases. Have you considered suicide?
kek screeching incel BTFO. don't expect a response from him
>Mostly big cats
If the threads on here are anything to by they probably mauled those male keepers for a reason...
Hey now, watch what you’re insinuating, they’re always watching…
Uhh moron, his point is that for every male zookeeper death, there’s like 50 more female deaths because they just seize up like a deer in headlights in the face of fear
And if more men die then that just means more men are employed as zookeepers or are charged with handling the dangerous beasts because women aren’t built for it and everybody knows it.
>Actually uses "Uhh" unironicaly
>Muh women
>"Everybody knows it"
See
and
. They seem to be more your speed if your interests are primarily the blight that is women.
>actually it's because (bullshit unprovable statistic)
>and if (bullshit unprovable statistic) actually isnt the case then its because of (major major cope) instead
It's like speaking to a toddler.
Yeah because women are all lining up for those dangerous fricked up jobs, right? It’s not like everyone intrinsically knows they’re just not cut out for handling dangerous beasts because they’d likely just get themselves killed. Nuh uh. Women got grrrl power, they can handle it just as well.
>youll notice men dont get killed ALL THE TIME
> le epic 4 examples over 10 years
Are you a moron ? Perhaps consider lobotomy so the rest of us can be spared from your pseudo intellectual supreme homosexualry
>one woman gets killed by a tapir
>ITS ALWAYS WOMEN WHO GET KILLED. EVERY ANIMAL WHO HAS EVER KILLED A ZOOKEEPER HAS KILLED A FEMALE ZOOKEEPER. I HATE WOMEN AND LOVE MEN.
>actually men die too here's 4 examples of exactly that
>UHH UHHHHHH THATS ONLY 4 EXAMPLES moron AHAHAHahahah..... y-yeah have a nice day ahahha
>Yeah because women are all lining up for those dangerous fricked up jobs, right?
Apparently so if every example of zookeepers dying is a woman. Furthermore, the vast majority of new-generation zookeepers are women. T. Is studying at an agricultural college that offers animal management. The majority of animal management, aquarist, equestrian, dairy etc students are women. Are horses and cattle suddenly no longer dangerous because women are around them now? Take the L you fricking mongoloid and go back underground where you belong.
I can’t believe how mad this dude is that he got owned, he’s positively screaming in every post
Chill brah
>Every time I hear one of these stories it's ALWAYS a woman.
>It's always a woman.
The person you are replying to has proved without a doubt that it is in fact not always a woman. Also, burden of proof is now on you to post every single recorded instance of zookeepers being injured by zoo animals so we can compare rates of injury by gender, since that is apparently the bar you want to set.
Please don't even in engage with this moronic shit. Can we post tapir instead?
thanks for the tapir fact
- Waufonymous
Also they have huge wieners.
Literally me
pige
… Ok? Is there a reason for informing us of this?
I encounter tapirs almost every week and didn't know that they were that dangerous. Thank you OP I will be more careful
I'm totally putting a dire tapir in my next campaign
Pige
Cum beast
Yeah, frick it I can tame it... or kill it if it comes to that
I'll ask for 20 gold coins in advance tho, to cover expenses for the hunting trip
I expect the rest when we come back
how much for a rendition of BANG BANG INGURLAND?
Did you accidentally post on the wrong board or something?
>good, I hope she does it again
The tapir cries out in pain as it mauls you and severs your arm
Is this /tg/ or Wauf not like I care
It's Wauf, this tapir post doesn't list stats or "what would your character do" bait.
Are tapirs aggressive in your setting?
>they weigh 300-600lbs
holy shit I thought a tapir was like a big dog
They're like a worse hog.
They're like a horse hog, and they have the "equipment" to show it
depends on the tapir tbh, some of the south american tapirs are the size of very large dogs.
malayan tapirs and bairds tapirs are fricking massive though
also hello Wauf from /tg/