who could fuck them up? sea creatures not included

who could fuck them up? sea creatures not included

  1. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    If I had a baseball bat I could probably beat one down over the course of 9 hours if I was careful.

  2. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    A dude with a rocket launcher

  3. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    *honk*

  4. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Polar bear
    Grizzly bear
    Lion
    Tiger
    Wolverine
    Jaguar
    Wolves
    Elephant
    Cape buffalo
    Gaur
    Hippo
    Rhino

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Polar bear
      >Grizzly bear
      >Lion
      >Tiger
      >Wolverine
      >Jaguar
      Would absolutely get fucked over, especially the wolverine, like are you even serious?
      >Elephant
      >Hippo
      >Rhino
      Yes

  5. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Rhino?

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      the only elephant that a rhino can kill

  6. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    An athletic human. Just grab rocks and keep throwing it at the seal. Its too sluggish at land and you can keep your distance. Eventually it will either suffer from blunt force trauma or flee.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      >rock throw dealt 0 damage!
      >rock throw dealt 0 damage!
      >rock throw dealt 0 damage!
      >rock throw dealt 0 damage!
      You'll literally die from exhaustion before you do any damage.

  7. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    What can an elephant actually do though? If you hug its hind legs it can't reach you with its truck, and its too sluggish to get away while you repeatedly pommel it from behind. If you stand to the side of its hind legs then it won't even be able to hit you with a back kick. If it raises its leg to perform a stomp then all you have to do is back off until it finishes its slam, then move back in to continue punching.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      What can an elephant actually do though?
      by sitting on them

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        just dodge roll the sit and continue pummeling its back.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Elephants can kick sideways aswell you retard

  8. 10 months ago
    Anonymous
    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      OP asked who could fuck them up not who gets fucked by them

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Nah, Polar Bears avoid Walruses unless they're desperate because of how dangerous they can be and how hard it is to kill one, an adult Elephant Seal bull is double the weight of a Walrus and mogs them in strength and aggressiveness in every fashion besides lacking tusks (but they still have a very nasty bite). People are underestimating how much damage they can do just by slamming into you

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        don't forget to mention their mates sometimes end up dying after sex.

  9. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    I could probably beat him in a fistfight, seeing as he has no hands

  10. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    Hippos are more mobile on land and about the same weight class.

  11. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    actual elephant

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      can elephants master nunchucku?

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        No that is a bear-exclusive weapon

  12. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    A chimpanzee with a machine gun

  13. 10 months ago
    Anonymous

    black mamba.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      okay second rule, no venomous creatures

      • 10 months ago
        Anonymous

        Could they even bite through all the fat/aim for some spot it would work before getting mauled?

        • 10 months ago
          Anonymous

          All the venom needs to do is hit the blood stream, and the fat is vacularized. The snake would be crushed but the seal would probably die, ending in a tie. Which is basically how every venomous snake vs. big animal fight goes.

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            *vascularized, I'm tired

          • 10 months ago
            Anonymous

            yeah but in general the bigger animal wins because they kill them first.

    • 10 months ago
      Anonymous

      Pretty much impossible for a black mamba to take one down, they deliver about 110 mg of toxin per bite, to kill an adult elephant seal you would need to deliver at least ten times that, right to it's lungs and heart, so little surface blood vessels won't do - only major veins.
      Snek would get crushed right during it's first bit.

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