So what, if you run into one of these things and it decides to attack you, you're just fricked?

So what, if you run into one of these things and it decides to attack you, you're just fricked? You die, end of story? How is that fair?

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    So what, if you run into one of these things and it decides to attack you, you're just fricked? You die, end of story? How is that fair?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      If you can keep it from biting you at most it can do superficial damage with its claws. They only weigh around 120 pounds. Their main prey is rabbits and baby deer, they would have no idea how to deal with a human and no stamina for a fight longer than a few seconds. It could definitely break a bone or leave a nasty gash but one solid hit to the face and it'd give up and run. It's not even
      >I could beat up a gorilla
      tier tough guy shit they just are not dangerous to a healthy adult male (XY) of normal height.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Gorillas are pussies irl

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          What? They’d tear you apart dude

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Not if you're actually fit and can lift their weight 350lbs

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              The frick does lifting have to do with fighting? Are you gonna approach an angry ape and pick it up like the fricking triforce?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That's true, you'd have to be a trained fighter but I'm sure a heavy weight MMA fighter could take on a gorilla and win

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous
            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >not if you’re well above the standard of physical fitness
              gorillas could lift way, way more than that

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Mountain lions are legitimately not a match for an adult human male
    You will get scratched up all over but it should be easy enough to strangle

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    And foreigners are always going on about the dangers of australian wildlife... Obviously it varies with region, but I'd be terrified of camping in the US with cougars and bears around.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      We should import a breeding population of Cheetahs.
      They'd probably fair better in the outback since:
      > Its relatively similar to their native environment
      > There's an abundance of potential prey animals
      > There are relatively few competitors which would be capable of stealing kills from it (Dingos, and aboriginals).

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's still the deadliest animal in America.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Wild mammal, perhaps

      most dangerous mammal period after humans is the pitbull

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Who would win in a fight, a mountain lion or a pitbull?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It depends if the mountain lion has time to prepare

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Mountain Lion needs one good swipe and that’s about it

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    38
    you need to take more english lessons before you get any more (you)s raj

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      So do normies ACTUALLY dance to pick people up or like what? Do people ACTUALLY do it in some weird form of courtship?

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    According to the 90's California public school system you're supposed to stand on your tip toes and raise your arms up to look taller. Even as a little shit I knew that would not work.

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    good morning sars do not poke the cows please sar vishnu not please!

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      He's indian which is why he views cattle as sacred animals, hindus like him worship cows

      You absolute arab mutt, had you noticed the continent your peninsula sticks out of like a tumor? You'd be amazed that no one here cares much for your bushmen bullshit. This isn't /misc/, you aren't getting asspats from your fellow brown people.

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Annoy big moo until big moo die, that what me call high culture
    >t. grog bigstick the big man in village who hunt many big moo

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >How is that fair?
    Since when is life fair?

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Why are you walking around in nature defenseless after millions of years evolving pic related to create weapons and coordinate large groups with?

    You're screwed, sure, and so is a lone wolf in africa, because wolves didn't evolve to be alone in africa.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You're right... I am so cucked by the government bros

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >How is that fair?
    Hah, nature doesn't care about 'fair.'
    Unless you've got a gun or knife you're probably screwed, alot of people couldn't hande a 100 pound dog going at them, let alone an apex predator.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Not at all, people successfully fight them off all the time because they don't stick around to finish prey that fights back. They wound, retreat and wait for you to die- but we have cell phones and are often in groups, so rescue is likely. Almost nobody dies to cougars as a result.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      except when, you know, they don't

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        They're like Spanish fighting bulls in that regard. Once they defeat a human they start seeking them out. That lion probably killed before.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >That lion probably killed before.
          doubt it. that was earlier in the year and was california's first fatal mountain lion attack in 20 years.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >They're like Spanish fighting bulls in that regard. Once they defeat a human they start seeking them out.
          Don't spanish always kill the bull tho? Like even if a bull rips apart every matador they throw at him they will just gang up on it with lances in hispanic manlet rage?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            not always

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            https://i.imgur.com/yV5RwqE.jpeg

            not always

            They're like Spanish fighting bulls in that regard. Once they defeat a human they start seeking them out. That lion probably killed before.

            >Slowly torture and animal to death like subhuman Demons
            >Get surprised when it unleashes its hatred upon a mob of people
            Humans are the actual villains of the world and we're dumb enough to deny it.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            It's not actually meant to be a fight, it's a drama. Bulls that kill are generally sent to pasture, sometimes they are euthenized sometimes not, regardless they are not to be put into the ring again. Americans are so funny, one man cannot fight a bull even with a sword. Whole point of preceding acts is to tire the neck muscle to make it possible to place in the sword between the shoulder blade to kill cleanly. Even then it is dangerous of course, maybe you think a bull weighs little because you can lift a burger in your goblin's paws?

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              So you just torture a bull for drama while dressed up like Liberace? Why are spaniards?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Bull is treated very well before he comes in the arena so he becomes strong. Usually he gets to breed. He has got a lot of adrenaline and gets illusion of victory when horses leave. Proper placed sword hits his heart and he dies very quickly. Meat is given to community. Better than rotting in factory barn eating shit until he becomes meat globules to clog burger arteries. Now go watch action movie where famous mutt shoots fifty people but the nipples are censored house dog.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I'm not even an american you fricking manlet moorish rapebaby.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You may as well be since it seems you love amerikwan sensibility so much. No appreciation of art or history maybe you would be better off over there among intelligence peers.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Art and history? Black person, you literaly dress like gays and pester an animal until it dies. It's something a bunch of drunk gypsies would do. But then again your people's contribution to the world was having the most inbreed kings and pissing away fortunes build on colonial empire. So yeah, I can see how you would see pestering a cow "high culture".

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Half of your penis is gone used to create wrinkle cream lol.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Can you read, or do I have to translate it to that arabized latin you call language? I'm not american you converso moron.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Lemme guess, you're a Northern Euro?
                I only ever get that smug attitude from Danes / Swedes / Nordics, occasionally Germans / Belgians.

                >atheist
                Where did you got that from you homosexual? Oh, yes. Poking bulls to death as weird ritual animal sacrifice. Very fricking Christian. I don't remember when Jesus ordered apostles to dress like male prostitutes and pester cattle. But it might be in the palmarian bible.

                Are you the above poster, or a different one?
                Where are you from?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                He's indian which is why he views cattle as sacred animals, hindus like him worship cows

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >ESL
                >crying about le colonials
                It makes sense.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It's not actually meant to be a fight, it's a drama. Bulls that kill are generally sent to pasture, sometimes they are euthenized sometimes not, regardless they are not to be put into the ring again. Americans are so funny, one man cannot fight a bull even with a sword. Whole point of preceding acts is to tire the neck muscle to make it possible to place in the sword between the shoulder blade to kill cleanly. Even then it is dangerous of course, maybe you think a bull weighs little because you can lift a burger in your goblin's paws?

                >obsessed

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Ignore the homosexuals, anon.
                I get you.

                Literal cucks
                >BROWN, BROWN, HE'S BROWN HAHA
                >let me go and huff my cat's toxo / dog's tapeworms from when they rubbed their buttholes on my pillow

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Could you be so kind and be brown somewhere else?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                a atheist crying about animal suffering.
                hilarious.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >atheist
                Where did you got that from you homosexual? Oh, yes. Poking bulls to death as weird ritual animal sacrifice. Very fricking Christian. I don't remember when Jesus ordered apostles to dress like male prostitutes and pester cattle. But it might be in the palmarian bible.

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I heard the cougar population is getting out of hand so much that cougars are now starting to pack with each other.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i'm gonna need a source

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    they usually aren't going to mess with you unless you get near their cubs

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    A little scratch behind the ear will tame all aggression

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    No, not really. Cougars are on the lower end of the ‘wildcat that will frick your shit up’ spectrum. You’ll probably be hurt pretty bad, but they aren’t so big or strong that your chances of survival are zero, that would be the case of say, a lion or a tiger.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This, basically.
      Keep its claws and teeth from your neck, and you will probably survive the encounter. If you are a decently fit adult male, you can likely overpower it, or at least compete with it athletically, enough to be too much of a nuisance for it to want to continue the fight.

      As always, keep a good knife with you at all times while in the woods, and you can kill or drive off 99% of what might attack you. Ideally, a fixed blade knife with finger holds to prevent it being knocked from your grip.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >or at least compete with it athletically
        the frick am I gonna do, challenge it to a game of basketball?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          has anyone tried this? maybe you're onto something

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            yes I tried it they have a mean dunk game don’t challenge them unless you play regularly

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Out grapple it. Humans are great at grappling, felines are okay at it, canines are awful at it. Its why grown men can fight off wolves.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          hey that's not a bad idea to be honest, imagine just whipping a 360 in front of a cougar and it looks at you in complete disbelief

          https://i.imgur.com/dVLhXHs.jpeg

          So what, if you run into one of these things and it decides to attack you, you're just fricked? You die, end of story? How is that fair?

          i have the secret techniques called head pats and fire

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        these fricks can kill ELK with their bare hands, the fricks timmy gonna do?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Shoot it? Not a hard concept

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    They're called mountain teddies for a reason, you know.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      they're also called 40-something odd other names, too, you know

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >They're called mountain teddies for a reason
      uh weren't they called horny middleaged woman at some point

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Wouldn’t mountain teddies be better applied to bears? Seems like it’s wasted on a cat.

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    finger in pooper

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    A literal scardy cat.
    Screams at you, does fake pounces at you, gives you every chance to frick off.
    If it attacks you, you are the culprit

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This. If you get attacked by one, you are 100% at fault. All you have to do is make eye contact and it runs away because it's an ambush hunter.

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >[insert any animal] runs into a human and he just decides to shoot it, it's just fricked? It dies, end of story? How is that fair?

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >NOOOOOOOO I DON'T WANT TO PROVIDE A BIG CAT AND XER FAMILY WITH FOOD!!!!!
    God forbid you do something useful with your life for once.

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    They are one of the most docile and easily tameable of all the big cats second only to cheetahs

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    you can set your pike against the ground and break the charge

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What if you forget your pike at home and all you have is your morningstar?

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    skill issue

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    sex

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Lol

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yea but you gotta make sure they're really full first. Then if she's in heat you can whip out your dick and she'll smell your pheromones and realize you're male

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