Please help me, Wauf, you're my only hope.
I live in an apartment building, and every morning I get woken up by the infuriating sound of pigeons near my window.
I've tried everything I could think of to get rid of them. I started with spikes, which kept them off my windowsill but just moved them up one floor. Then I bought a holographic owl, which didn't seem to do anything. Then I bought one of those high-frequency emitters that are supposed to scare off vermin and birds, but I aimed it DIRECTLY at one of the fuckers and it didn't seem bothered in the least.
Guns aren't a thing in my country and even airsoft is heavily regulated, so recently I bought one of those electronic bb guns to hopefully scare them off for good, but it's quite loud and I only get two shots off before they fly away.
What can I do to get some fucking sleep?