My quiet suburban neighborhood has been invaded by a large number of Does (haven’t seen a single Buck yet), and a few of them have decided to set up shot in my back yard. How can I deal with them without injuring them (too much)?
Need help repelling these awful creatures
I have kind of a hatred for deer. Not only are they terrible pests, but they wreck your car when you hit them and they never come out during deer season.
Pro-tip: build 8x8 raised gardens so the deer won't jump over your fence.
rape the shit out of one
the rest should flee in fear. if they don't, you have a new gf or four
Sprint out into your yard like a maniac with an air horn blasting
Theres shit you can spread around your property line that spook them off.
You can also hang some CD's from fishing line.
The saying is put up shop not shot.
Too shy to make a thread so I'll just treat this as pest general. I have moles in my backyard and I want to start a vegetable garden, should I exterminate them? I remember hearing once upon a time that they only eat bugs and make your yard look terrible, they don't damage crops.
no personal experience, but that's what I've heard as well.
also that ground-dwelling bees like the holes they leave behind
gays need to learn how to lay a hedge
aren't they migratory? can't you just wait a bit until they move on?
Run after them while banging on a pot with a spoon
Bro venison is fucking delicious. Shoot them. It’s legal where you live, isn’t it?
Down here, white tailed deer are endangered and it it a crime to kill them. But people still shoot them for the meat regardless.
>without injuring them (too much)?
shot through the head should be painless
Mark ur territory with pee(eat wheat for a stronger oddor)
One word : deerussy
Display them on crosses to intimidate any future deer.
its too late.
prepare to be buck broken.
Find a few datura/jimson weed plants and graft tomato vines onto them and place them around your garden.
The tomatoes that grow will be extremely poisonous and the deer should happily consume them all leading to an extremely painful death entirely untraceable to you.
Give them steroids
Rape them right in the dussy
Make them your wives
>gold opportunity to reintroduce wolves
>hurr durr let's just shoot them
filthy americans
But our cattlerinos will get ate! What do you mean "have smaller herds guarded by dogs"? We need giant megablobs of cow suffering to truly be Patriotic™ and Free™.
>set up shot
>shot
thats a Freudian slip if I've ever heard one. You know what to do.
It is 2023 anon.
You don't ask anons for help, you ask ChatGPT.
Why am I hard?
you should have a nice day as well
Uhh based?
>graceful animals
Deer have 2 brain cells rubbing against each other. They are dumb, skittish and clumsy as fuck.
Put out a sign
Just eat them. Doe is tastier than buck and you suppress the deer population that way. Of course deer in general tastes like shit so you’ll be mixing them with pork or something to make sausage.
They are pest animals that huntingfags purposefully stock the woods with and prop up with bullshit predator exterminations so they can justify their hobby
you can also supress deer population by pouching does from bucks and make them your sex toys.
have a nice day immediately
lol mad homo
Why are they bothering you?
Eating my garden + shitting everywhere
oh no poor grasserino, should've let it grow properly instead of cutting it once a week to a millimeter, now the munchers are gonna uproot them from the soil. oh no the HOA's gonna kill me
Cervix vermin hooves clacked out this post. Nice try bambi you grass munching fuck. The oven is the only place your kind belongs.
>cervix
What the fuck autocorrect
Cervid. That’s worse than my phone wanting to capitalize “the great leap forward” (backward) and not having mutilate or mutilation in its 1984 tier dictionary
Holy shit, it actually does capitalize the Great Leap Forward. I never knew!
>Holy shit, it actually does capitalize the Great Leap Forward. I never knew!
That's some scary NWO propaganda.
Not really. It is a proper noun, referencing a specific event, it should be capitalized.
You're mentally ill if you're regularly using those words or phrases
>he doesn't know
I don't know that whites are the true israelites and garden gnomes are only larping as chosen from the time herod and the edomites took over judea? of course I do
>we wuz kangs that accomplished absolutely nothing and then the rest of the middle east kicked our asses forever while inventing writing and civilization n sheeit and they had pet cheetahs and purebred dogs while we complained about street dogs we were too dumb to train yooooooo
not a great claim to make
I mean, I know the futility of trying to talk about history on Wauf, but did you read the Bible? garden gnome = Yehudim = descendants of Yehudah/Judah, the kind of douchey son of Jacob that they had to say he inexplicably chose as the inheritor of the covenant at the end of Genesis because all the other Israelites had been pwned by the time the Torah was being edited and compiled. All the other Israelites clans got rekt by Assyrians, and dispersed around and mutted-up into oblivion in neighboring areas, so only the Judah clan remained. Well, and Benjamin, but they also just got mutted-up into the larger Judah clan until they forgot they were their own thing and stopped claiming to exist separately.
Although if we're being honest, the claims of the Samaritans to be descended from non-gnomish Israelites are actually pretty reasonable, no matter how much it might troll the garden gnomes and how vociferously it was denied in the later parts of the Bible.
Inb4 needlessly aggressive response that tries to school me with more meme-lessons made by fourteen year old boys who've never read anything longer than a blog post, yes, I know it's all a waste of time.
That's what you get for being a filthy phoneposter
>talk about does
>immediately type cervix
Sure, sure. It was "autocorrect"
>t. golf enthusiast garden butcher
The hooves are off. No more mr nice ungulate. Come at me you apes, you're long due for this
>just two more weeks
Cloven hooves typed out this post
he said "garden", not "yard"
You call that a garden?
Also either you shoot them or you put a much higher fence. There are repulsive products you can buy at your local gardening store but be aware it's also repulsive for humans, it stinks really bad.
grow deerproof plants such as prickly pear
prickly pear cactus is also edible and tasty and can be used as free animal feed if you have tortoises or iguanas
Deer are a huge pest.
This is a perfect opportunity to acquire a deer wife anon. Don't pass it up.
the good lord has provided you with free meat
No fence? Not my problem.
Fence? Get a dog