Is there any species more sigma than seaguls?
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Is there any species more sigma than seaguls?
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All they do is harass elderly brits. So yes they are the most based animal to ever exist
I like south texas on the beach. The Grackles and Seagulls create a DMZ
Man I fricking love seagulls, the fact that they make so many people seethe is fun too
Magpies
i feed every single pigeon and crow in my local area to make sure i'm not on any birds shitlist
There was this one magpie that would swoop me every day on my way to school. Eventually I got sick of it and just grabbed it out of the air and put it in my school bag. After about 5 minutes I let it out. I saw the little c**t every morning after that it never fricked with me again
Stop lying it aussie
Emus and magpies are apex predators in australia
Black person
Sponges.
>drench bread in some poison
>leave it out for the birds to fight over
done
poison is always shit tier for dealing with animals because you easily run into mass poisoning when the animal dies and something else comes by to eat it, and then on and on.
Not my problem.
You need to go back, Wauf clearly isn't the board for your kind.
>N-NOOO YOU CAN'T JUST KILL ANIMALS!! THAT'S NOT HECKIN COOLERINO!!!!
>goes to the board about appreciating and talking about animals and nature
>somehow confused why people would be upset at the idea of not only using poison to kill animals slowly and painfully, but also carelessly and proudly killing additional animals unrelated to the animals they originally wanted to kill
the coolest part about animals and nature the endless brutal death though
It really is summer
You know animals produce poison naturally, and die naturally, you fricking moron? Who cares if he kills some vermin with poison people have no problem doing it with rats and insects. You sound like a beta.
Good point, but I can push my throbbing penis down your oesophagus until I cum and you gargle in tears that you love me naturally yet you don't want me to do it I assume you stupid fricking cuck beta spastic.
man-made poison isn't the same. it persists and kills predators and scavengers who eat the tainted dead animals. this is a huge problem for vultures and birds of prey.
Unfortunately my peace of mind outweighs the rights of every animal combined in my reality. If 8 trillion horses, donkeys, blue jays, orangutans, rabbits and tarantulas have to die for me to never deal with a sky rat again, that's a price I'm willing to pay.
>that's a price I'm willing to pay.
Do us all a favor and read up on Mao and the Four Pests campaign, you might learn something.
Doubtful a sociopath is capable of learning anything but the details of pyramid schemes.
>Who cares if
Ah, you always know you're in for a quality post when sentence begins with this. Sociopathy should warrant the death penalty. As soon as any child shows lack of empathy OFF with their fricking head.
it will be when it goes into an animal that humans eat
>Janny thinks varmint removal is off topic
>on the animals and nature board
Figure it out buddy.
And they're antisemitic
is this like a case of one israelite being a dick to the birds, so now the birds attack anyone remotely looking like the first guy to be a dick to them?
Sounds familiar
Explains a lot.
wtf I love gulls now?
No, you can't shoot in a residential area.
So why not just use a bb gun? None of the neighbors have any chance of hearing it and you still get a dead gull.
We had this with seagulls at my uni house. All you have to do is go out and hit the fricker with a cricket bat when it comes swooping at you, they break really easy.
these winged rats would be dead so fast if they did this to me
>AAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEE n-no, gull-sama please I was jus- ACK
Fun fact: Seagulls are smarter than the smartest dogs, near corvid levels of intelligence.
For perspective, a border collie is about twice as smart as an average "clever" large dog due to having a larger brain:body ratio and enlarged cortex, the typical large dog (shepherd, spitz, lesser collie breed, mastiff etc) is 6-8 times smarter than a housecat, which is several times smarter than the well studied rat, although much less cooperative and willing to learn.
If we ccan onsider dogs sentient and near-sapient with intelligence on par with small primates and clear evidence of thoughts, feelings, opinion formation, rudimentary theory of mind and episodic memory, etc, and since we have observed wild wolves passing knowledge on to their pups generation after generation, then seagulls likely possess great ape levels of intelligence and should be given a form of personhood.
Seagulls have been observed exhibiting complex social and problem solving behaviors more typical of chimpanzees and dolphins.
When a seagull asks about it, we can consider it.
They asked. You didn't listen. And now they torment you, like dejected gangs of immigrants terrorizing new york. If the people won't recognize their rights, they won't recognize theirs.
Rap battle when?
>WE WUZ MESSENGERS N SHIET
>cats are smarter than rats
Yeah nah I call bullshit.
frick they are so smart one of them made this post.
great mini-doc about how a seagull learned to hunt pigeons for food instead of scavenging, not sure about all of the extrapolation on animal intelligence but seagulls are relatively smart bird.
That's illegal though.
Nobody is going to investigate
Frick the government and frick the lizard people trying to force bird "culture" on us. Get a cat and have it rip those fricking buzzards throats out.
https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/320786/it's-seagull-attack-season-hide-your-cats
the cowardly c*t fears the CHADgull
these slinking overgrown weasels are nothing if they fight like men
Fighting like a man is a government phrase to keep people predictable and in line. A gun can change the entire course of history so they can't let us have it. Keep things safe and predictable. Pull a gun on a seagull and shoot him down
Nah, I will provide food and shelter to seagulls.
Gonna train gulls to peck the eyes and genitals off of cats.
And yet a single norf English man destroyed a seagull cause it pinched his chip
If only there was a simple and inexpensive way to distract the birds. Oh well guess they'll just keep living in fear of flying sea rats.
Canadian geese i can kind of understand but seagulls? Just grab the damn thing and kill it. Humans are part of nature and in nature acts of aggression end in death of one of the participants.
Crows?
Get a bunch of crows and feed them to protect you.
they should have shotguns
I don't think we should give shotguns to birds.
They have a nest/chick nearby. Their own fault for not relocating the egg/chick themselves.
Gulls are the rats of the sky, I say yeet the egg the moment you spot it near your house, but moving it works just as well, place it near the house of someone you hate.
Are slingshots illegal? Shoot, is throwing a rock with your hand illegal?
t. assumes this absurdity is Britbong in nature
Herring gulls are a protected species. If you kill one or move their nests you can get a hefty fine. Mind you I'm Irish so while it's still illegal to shoot them, people do it anyway.
Every single day when I'd head for the tube station in Canary Wharf at around 5.30 and I'd have a cigarette outside by the bike racks before going underground. And every single day there was a single seagull waiting there for a man to walk by and it would attack him. Swear it had a vendetta against him.
They don't bother me though. I was in hospital for a few weeks in March and covid meant I was locked in my room and couldn't leave. No family or friends could come visit me. So I made friends with a seagull who'd I'd feed the shite hospital food to. Even he didn't eat the horrible spring roll though
why is food at hospitals so horribly bad ?
I dunno man, like I had to get my girlfriend to drop in fresh fruit to me which was the highlight of my day. The food they feed you isn't designed to make you better as far as I'm concerned. Like look at this sugary, soya filled carb for evening meal. Supposed to be a spring roll but it's just filo pastry with noodles and tomato sauce.
Really depends on the hospital.
I was an orderly for a while and our hospital actually had a pretty decent canteen.
But generally speaking, hospitals are expensive as frick to run, and you've got to cut costs where you can (which is why I really don't think medicine should be a strictly for-profit industry).
Also, when you're feeding an entire hospital wing its sort of like cafeteria lunch in school. You have to make a lot of shit in a short order of time to accommodate a bunch of people, so the more bland and generic the fewer people who CAN'T eat it.
And lastly, you have a large building full of people pumped full of drugs, in various stages of recovery or convalescence, and often hooked up to so much crap that it's not practical to get in and out of bed to use the restroom (if you're even in a condition to do that). If you have dozens of people shitting in bed pans, do you want a big steaming greasy turd from some guy who just ate a big steak dinner with grilled onions and cauliflower with feta crumbles OR a guy who ate half a baked potato?
I read this in this guy's voice
>Im irish
Frickin so did i hahaha
>trashy sea birds are a protected species
are anglos actually insane
>are anglos actually insane
after the passenger pigeon fiasco and the near extinction of the Baalzebub Leaf Goose we're pretty careful.
>caring about animals
>insane
what barbaric third world shithole do you come from then
>Thinking literal vermin need protected status
Do you let rats live in your house, chewing your wires and pissing in your food?
>whining that animals eat and shit all over the place as though that's not what happens in nature
are you mentally ill
>focken amerimutts don'even let their rats shit in'e sink. that's a bit funny innit?
oi mate we only let im do at cause they're the queens rats ya tossa
meds
>have to visit relative in hospital
>that fricking hospital smell
>for some reason they keep feeding her stale spaghetti bolognese
>got so disgusted by proxy that i couldn't eat spaghetti for years without smelling hospital
>Dave Baker, 43, says he has been repeatedly dive-bombed in “coordinated attacks” while running to his local shop.
>Dave says he and his family have to arm themselves with brooms and walking sticks and take the family dog for short walks while carrying a garden parasol.
>If the birds are lying in wait, mum Nicki, 41, says she must phone ahead and ask daughter Katrina, 10, to fetch the garden parasol so she can make it home safely.
Holy shit, at that point jsut buy a large net, catch one out of the air and stomp on its head for all the others to see, they'll learn not to frick around with you. Pisses me off when people let themselves get bullied by some weakass animal that wouldn't survive a single punch.
Bad luck to kill a seabird
t. seagull
>Bad luck
Yeah
for the bird
Good movie, kind of unsatisfying ending.
I didn't really get the point of it. I guess film as its own artform is just lost on me. I get writing and painting, because of how flowery and organic they are. Film and photography are just so fricking technical.
>HAAARK!
Only when you're at sea.
Don't need those screeching buttholes to lead me to land when I live on a mountain.
I think seagulls rat birds get pass. That more for albatrosses.
the ancient mariner
at sea sure
but not on LAND
They are protected by tribal laws. It's sickening that dead indians have so much control over our modern lives and it's high time somebody did something about it. We're expected to live with these aggressive destructive creatures just because some people think they're pretty even while they scream all night and drive down property values. They have no value otherwise they can't even be eaten.
>hehe yeah those birds are like the sacred spirits of our ancestors or whatever, dumb white people
Don't think those are yanks mate
I would do it anyway
throw a hunk of stale bread and safely go about your way as they fight each other for it. fricking absolute morons cant think up a fricking solution as easy as this
I do not believe this to be particularly smart, I'd expect the birds to become even more invasive if you start feeding them regularly.
You don't even have to kill them, just hold one for like 5 minutes, maybe bring it in the house to traumatize it a little, and then let it go. It gets around the killing part so you don't get in trouble, and the birds learn through repeated trauma that ay, the hate that. Maybe they shouldn't do that.
I've had to do this with blue Jays and black birds; the ravens you just make peace with though. They're so only one way with ravens unless you literally want bloodshed.
Everyone wonders why my neighbor's butthole rooster attacks everyone but me (even his owners). The answer is that I held him like a murse one day while I mowed my lawn, because he was trying to fight my leg. Now he knows I'm not to be fricked with and he just pretends that he's OK with whatever I do, but my dumb b***h neighbor has to use a broom to collect eggs, and they no longer entertain in their formerly well landscaped back garden.
Fricking yuppies, even if you can't figure out how to live with a rooster, you could still just kill it instead of living in fear of your own pet for going on 3 years now.
Didn't happen, plus the humans deserved it.
The duality of Britons...
absolutely based. seagulls must learn their place
I kept reading parasol as pistol and imagined these fat bongs waving a gun around at a bunch of ornery birds to get in their car. If only real life could be as based as my inability to read.
The morons who let geese bully them piss me off so much. Show some fricking pride for your species, worm.
>Go to wealthy Haredi neighborhood with a bag of fries, dressed as a Haredi
>Let the seagulls swarm over me and take all the fries
>Do this every day for months
>Also get my realtor license
Easy money, mate, easy money.
>instead of fighting them, off food
>build trust over time
>gain army of sigma seagulls
I don't see the downside.