Is there any species more sigma than seaguls?

Is there any species more sigma than seaguls?

  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    All they do is harass elderly brits. So yes they are the most based animal to ever exist

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I like south texas on the beach. The Grackles and Seagulls create a DMZ

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Man I fucking love seagulls, the fact that they make so many people seethe is fun too

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Magpies

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    i feed every single pigeon and crow in my local area to make sure i'm not on any birds shitlist

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    There was this one magpie that would swoop me every day on my way to school. Eventually I got sick of it and just grabbed it out of the air and put it in my school bag. After about 5 minutes I let it out. I saw the little cunt every morning after that it never fucked with me again

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Stop lying it aussie
      Emus and magpies are apex predators in australia

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    moron

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Sponges.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >drench bread in some poison
    >leave it out for the birds to fight over
    done

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      poison is always shit tier for dealing with animals because you easily run into mass poisoning when the animal dies and something else comes by to eat it, and then on and on.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Not my problem.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          You need to go back, Wauf clearly isn't the board for your kind.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >N-NOOO YOU CAN'T JUST KILL ANIMALS!! THAT'S NOT HECKIN COOLERINO!!!!

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >goes to the board about appreciating and talking about animals and nature
              >somehow confused why people would be upset at the idea of not only using poison to kill animals slowly and painfully, but also carelessly and proudly killing additional animals unrelated to the animals they originally wanted to kill

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                the coolest part about animals and nature the endless brutal death though

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                It really is summer

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                You know animals produce poison naturally, and die naturally, you fucking retard? Who cares if he kills some vermin with poison people have no problem doing it with rats and insects. You sound like a beta.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Good point, but I can push my throbbing penis down your oesophagus until I cum and you gargle in tears that you love me naturally yet you don't want me to do it I assume you stupid fucking cuck beta spastic.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                man-made poison isn't the same. it persists and kills predators and scavengers who eat the tainted dead animals. this is a huge problem for vultures and birds of prey.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Unfortunately my peace of mind outweighs the rights of every animal combined in my reality. If 8 trillion horses, donkeys, blue jays, orangutans, rabbits and tarantulas have to die for me to never deal with a sky rat again, that's a price I'm willing to pay.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >that's a price I'm willing to pay.
                Do us all a favor and read up on Mao and the Four Pests campaign, you might learn something.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Doubtful a sociopath is capable of learning anything but the details of pyramid schemes.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >Who cares if
                Ah, you always know you're in for a quality post when sentence begins with this. Sociopathy should warrant the death penalty. As soon as any child shows lack of empathy OFF with their fucking head.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          it will be when it goes into an animal that humans eat

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >Janny thinks varmint removal is off topic
    >on the animals and nature board
    Figure it out buddy.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    And they're antisemitic

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      is this like a case of one garden gnome being a dick to the birds, so now the birds attack anyone remotely looking like the first guy to be a dick to them?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Sounds familiar

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Explains a lot.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      wtf I love gulls now?

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    No, you can't shoot in a residential area.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      So why not just use a bb gun? None of the neighbors have any chance of hearing it and you still get a dead gull.

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    We had this with seagulls at my uni house. All you have to do is go out and hit the fucker with a cricket bat when it comes swooping at you, they break really easy.

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    these winged rats would be dead so fast if they did this to me

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >AAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEE n-no, gull-sama please I was jus- ACK

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Fun fact: Seagulls are smarter than the smartest dogs, near corvid levels of intelligence.

    For perspective, a border collie is about twice as smart as an average "clever" large dog due to having a larger brain:body ratio and enlarged cortex, the typical large dog (shepherd, spitz, lesser collie breed, mastiff etc) is 6-8 times smarter than a housecat, which is several times smarter than the well studied rat, although much less cooperative and willing to learn.

    If we ccan onsider dogs sentient and near-sapient with intelligence on par with small primates and clear evidence of thoughts, feelings, opinion formation, rudimentary theory of mind and episodic memory, etc, and since we have observed wild wolves passing knowledge on to their pups generation after generation, then seagulls likely possess great ape levels of intelligence and should be given a form of personhood.

    Seagulls have been observed exhibiting complex social and problem solving behaviors more typical of chimpanzees and dolphins.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      When a seagull asks about it, we can consider it.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        They asked. You didn't listen. And now they torment you, like dejected gangs of immigrants terrorizing new york. If the people won't recognize their rights, they won't recognize theirs.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Rap battle when?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >WE WUZ MESSENGERS N SHIET

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >cats are smarter than rats
      Yeah nah I call bullshit.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      fuck they are so smart one of them made this post.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      great mini-doc about how a seagull learned to hunt pigeons for food instead of scavenging, not sure about all of the extrapolation on animal intelligence but seagulls are relatively smart bird.

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    That's illegal though.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Nobody is going to investigate

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Fuck the government and fuck the lizard people trying to force bird "culture" on us. Get a cat and have it rip those fucking buzzards throats out.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/320786/it's-seagull-attack-season-hide-your-cats
        the cowardly c*t fears the CHADgull

        these slinking overgrown weasels are nothing if they fight like men

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Fighting like a man is a government phrase to keep people predictable and in line. A gun can change the entire course of history so they can't let us have it. Keep things safe and predictable. Pull a gun on a seagull and shoot him down

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Nah, I will provide food and shelter to seagulls.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Gonna train gulls to peck the eyes and genitals off of cats.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    And yet a single norf English man destroyed a seagull cause it pinched his chip

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    If only there was a simple and inexpensive way to distract the birds. Oh well guess they'll just keep living in fear of flying sea rats.

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Canadian geese i can kind of understand but seagulls? Just grab the damn thing and kill it. Humans are part of nature and in nature acts of aggression end in death of one of the participants.

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Crows?

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Get a bunch of crows and feed them to protect you.

  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    they should have shotguns

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I don't think we should give shotguns to birds.

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    They have a nest/chick nearby. Their own fault for not relocating the egg/chick themselves.
    Gulls are the rats of the sky, I say yeet the egg the moment you spot it near your house, but moving it works just as well, place it near the house of someone you hate.

  26. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Are slingshots illegal? Shoot, is throwing a rock with your hand illegal?
    t. assumes this absurdity is Britbong in nature

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Herring gulls are a protected species. If you kill one or move their nests you can get a hefty fine. Mind you I'm Irish so while it's still illegal to shoot them, people do it anyway.

      https://i.imgur.com/jj3CW1E.jpg

      Is there any species more sigma than seaguls?

      Every single day when I'd head for the tube station in Canary Wharf at around 5.30 and I'd have a cigarette outside by the bike racks before going underground. And every single day there was a single seagull waiting there for a man to walk by and it would attack him. Swear it had a vendetta against him.

      They don't bother me though. I was in hospital for a few weeks in March and covid meant I was locked in my room and couldn't leave. No family or friends could come visit me. So I made friends with a seagull who'd I'd feed the shite hospital food to. Even he didn't eat the horrible spring roll though

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        why is food at hospitals so horribly bad ?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I dunno man, like I had to get my girlfriend to drop in fresh fruit to me which was the highlight of my day. The food they feed you isn't designed to make you better as far as I'm concerned. Like look at this sugary, soya filled carb for evening meal. Supposed to be a spring roll but it's just filo pastry with noodles and tomato sauce.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Really depends on the hospital.
          I was an orderly for a while and our hospital actually had a pretty decent canteen.
          But generally speaking, hospitals are expensive as fuck to run, and you've got to cut costs where you can (which is why I really don't think medicine should be a strictly for-profit industry).
          Also, when you're feeding an entire hospital wing its sort of like cafeteria lunch in school. You have to make a lot of shit in a short order of time to accommodate a bunch of people, so the more bland and generic the fewer people who CAN'T eat it.
          And lastly, you have a large building full of people pumped full of drugs, in various stages of recovery or convalescence, and often hooked up to so much crap that it's not practical to get in and out of bed to use the restroom (if you're even in a condition to do that). If you have dozens of people shitting in bed pans, do you want a big steaming greasy turd from some guy who just ate a big steak dinner with grilled onions and cauliflower with feta crumbles OR a guy who ate half a baked potato?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I read this in this guy's voice

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Im irish
          Fuckin so did i hahaha

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >trashy sea birds are a protected species
        are anglos actually insane

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >are anglos actually insane
          after the passenger pigeon fiasco and the near extinction of the Baalzebub Leaf Goose we're pretty careful.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >caring about animals
          >insane
          what barbaric third world shithole do you come from then

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >Thinking literal vermin need protected status
            Do you let rats live in your house, chewing your wires and pissing in your food?

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >whining that animals eat and shit all over the place as though that's not what happens in nature
              are you mentally ill

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >focken amerimutts don'even let their rats shit in'e sink. that's a bit funny innit?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                oi mate we only let im do at cause they're the queens rats ya tossa

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Thinking literal vermin need protected status
          Do you let rats live in your house, chewing your wires and pissing in your food?

          meds

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        why is food at hospitals so horribly bad ?

        https://i.imgur.com/EP7FWkP.jpg

        I dunno man, like I had to get my girlfriend to drop in fresh fruit to me which was the highlight of my day. The food they feed you isn't designed to make you better as far as I'm concerned. Like look at this sugary, soya filled carb for evening meal. Supposed to be a spring roll but it's just filo pastry with noodles and tomato sauce.

        >have to visit relative in hospital
        >that fucking hospital smell
        >for some reason they keep feeding her stale spaghetti bolognese
        >got so disgusted by proxy that i couldn't eat spaghetti for years without smelling hospital

  27. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Dave Baker, 43, says he has been repeatedly dive-bombed in “coordinated attacks” while running to his local shop.
    >Dave says he and his family have to arm themselves with brooms and walking sticks and take the family dog for short walks while carrying a garden parasol.
    >If the birds are lying in wait, mum Nicki, 41, says she must phone ahead and ask daughter Katrina, 10, to fetch the garden parasol so she can make it home safely.
    Holy shit, at that point jsut buy a large net, catch one out of the air and stomp on its head for all the others to see, they'll learn not to fuck around with you. Pisses me off when people let themselves get bullied by some weakass animal that wouldn't survive a single punch.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Bad luck to kill a seabird

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        t. seagull

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Bad luck
        Yeah
        for the bird

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Good movie, kind of unsatisfying ending.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I didn't really get the point of it. I guess film as its own artform is just lost on me. I get writing and painting, because of how flowery and organic they are. Film and photography are just so fucking technical.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >HAAARK!

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Only when you're at sea.
        Don't need those screeching assholes to lead me to land when I live on a mountain.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I think seagulls rat birds get pass. That more for albatrosses.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        the ancient mariner

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        at sea sure
        but not on LAND

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      They are protected by tribal laws. It's sickening that dead indians have so much control over our modern lives and it's high time somebody did something about it. We're expected to live with these aggressive destructive creatures just because some people think they're pretty even while they scream all night and drive down property values. They have no value otherwise they can't even be eaten.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >hehe yeah those birds are like the sacred spirits of our ancestors or whatever, dumb white people

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Don't think those are yanks mate

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I would do it anyway

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      throw a hunk of stale bread and safely go about your way as they fight each other for it. fucking absolute retards cant think up a fucking solution as easy as this

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I do not believe this to be particularly smart, I'd expect the birds to become even more invasive if you start feeding them regularly.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You don't even have to kill them, just hold one for like 5 minutes, maybe bring it in the house to traumatize it a little, and then let it go. It gets around the killing part so you don't get in trouble, and the birds learn through repeated trauma that ay, the hate that. Maybe they shouldn't do that.

      I've had to do this with blue Jays and black birds; the ravens you just make peace with though. They're so only one way with ravens unless you literally want bloodshed.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Everyone wonders why my neighbor's asshole rooster attacks everyone but me (even his owners). The answer is that I held him like a murse one day while I mowed my lawn, because he was trying to fight my leg. Now he knows I'm not to be fucked with and he just pretends that he's OK with whatever I do, but my dumb bitch neighbor has to use a broom to collect eggs, and they no longer entertain in their formerly well landscaped back garden.

        Fucking yuppies, even if you can't figure out how to live with a rooster, you could still just kill it instead of living in fear of your own pet for going on 3 years now.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Didn't happen, plus the humans deserved it.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      https://i.imgur.com/jj3CW1E.jpg

      Is there any species more sigma than seaguls?

      The duality of Britons...

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        absolutely based. seagulls must learn their place

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I kept reading parasol as pistol and imagined these fat bongs waving a gun around at a bunch of ornery birds to get in their car. If only real life could be as based as my inability to read.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The morons who let geese bully them piss me off so much. Show some fucking pride for your species, worm.

      is this like a case of one garden gnome being a dick to the birds, so now the birds attack anyone remotely looking like the first guy to be a dick to them?

      >Go to wealthy Haredi neighborhood with a bag of fries, dressed as a Haredi
      >Let the seagulls swarm over me and take all the fries
      >Do this every day for months
      >Also get my realtor license
      Easy money, mate, easy money.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      throw a hunk of stale bread and safely go about your way as they fight each other for it. fucking absolute retards cant think up a fucking solution as easy as this

      >instead of fighting them, off food
      >build trust over time
      >gain army of sigma seagulls
      I don't see the downside.

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