If you could do animal research with a massive budget and no regards for ethics, what would you do? Posted on April 8, 2023 by Anonymous If you could do animal research with a massive budget and no regards for ethics, what would you do?
Head transplants. I start with monkeys and work my way up to humans.
Genetically engineer parasitoid wasps to be able to parasitise and behaviourally modify mammals.
Create a domesticated kangaroo through selective breeding. Imagine docile kangaroos that can't jump over fences and have plenty of lean meat on them.
Theyre called wallabies
Breed land cross.
I'm trying to figure out how to breed the best feeling pussy in the animal kingdom
Don't need to, dolphins already exist.
i'm restarting the fox domestication program
I'd find a way to make sure dogs never get swollen anal glands.
Breed giant chihuahuas the size of bull mastiffs.
Eugenically direct the trajectory of populations so that everyone looks like 6'4 underwear models with 6 pack abs.
>genetically alter mosquitoes to not need to consume blood to breed
>wait for them to breed bloodsucking mosquitoes out of existence
Domesticate river otters in 3-4 generations.
Give functional biological or robot hands for animals, then observe how it goes.
research animal sexual psychology. Figure out if the redditors are right about their muh consent or not
I would create creatures that look exactly like vintage dinosaur art.
Dis bro will fuck you up
Give scorpions the ability to fly and turn its poison into aids
>what would you do?
sharks with frikkin laser beams on their head
Uplift mustelids to sapience. Focus on wolverines, Amazonian giant otters, fishers, sea otters, river otters, martens, and ferrets first.
No mustelid is disposable.
Man, Bill Murray had some weird jobs before he did Meatballs.
Uplift ravens, orangutans, and orcas. You know, for fun.
I want to make crazy hybrids/increase cognition to see what animals could eventually speak.
I'd do a massive tournament of animals to awnser the questions we always ask like would a grizzly or Gorilla win?
>research how to induce long-term deep amnesia
>I mean making people forget everything
>just their memories of events and well... everything
>they keep their personalities (or the most psrt) language capabilities, etc etc.
>take a group of a dozen varied people, of different languages, cultures and races.
>put them on an abandoned island
>observe how they come together, what language comes of them, what society?
Now that's interesting but not for the study of tabula rasa language, but to see if you can retain your personality if all memories are stripped away, if that's more like muscle memory and not related to your declarative memory
I would create cat-girls
Researching to see how much i have to pay people to bring me the heads of poachers after I supply them with weapon
I want to do this too, but you know africans, they'll just kill random people and sell their heads as if they're poachers
>more dead Africans
The problem is?
I'd do it for free, provided bed and board is covered. Also that my ass is covered legally. I already have the best tool for the job, just tell me where to sign
I too enjoy call of duty
this wont work, the people supplying the poachers just send more
to stop the the trade you must cut of the demand
my plan would be this
>some how permiate rhino horns, pangolin scales, etc with cyanide
?when the end consumer tries to eat it, they die
>now after the first few deaths people would be confused
>then once they link it to these poached items there will be panic among the users
>now you anounce what has been done
>people would panic as they wouldnt know what horns had been tainted so you would end the demand
Find a substance that can kill exclusively cats and air drop it over the whole world
Do you mean domestic cats, or all cat species?
This, but for subhumans that hate cats
Based, I support your cause.
>Samefagging your own post
I'd make humans with gills so we could go underwater
But whales poop there.
I would collect milk samples from every mammal species and see which produces the best tasting and most nutritious milk. If I have funding afterwards for a second project, taste test every egg
russian fox domestication project but with zebras
Its already going on in texas
Got a link?
Quick search only brings up J. Diamond gayry citing a study from over a century ago.
Play god and eventually go mad
I'd pick an island, create really weird living conditions there, throw in a bunch of small animals and see how they evolve.
Immortal cyborg orangutans with transcendental intelligence
I’m going to try to properly domesticate some big monitors and crocodilians.
Make all farm animals extinct, genocide human population to sustainable levels (for some extra fun, gotta fuck up all races equally and force them to work together if they want to live), and let the wilds repopulate.
Also set up a mechanism to do it again if the human population ever gets over a threshold, or any race's population decreases below a threshold (only I get to do genocides).
Kill this woman(man) and anyone who thinks like xher
Earth shall become a construct of glorious immortal metal. The weakness of the flesh is disgusting.
>(for some extra fun, gotta fuck up all races equally and force them to work together if they want to live)
I think you dropped a couple "("s and ")"s on the ends there
Make human hybrids
Human/Dolphin sexual relationships.
Collie type dogs with human intelligence
I'd work on getting parthenogenesis to occur in a laboratory setting in mammals and birds. Probably use rabbits and rats and chickens respectively. Both rats and rabbits are the go to laboratory animal and if I managed to make a strain of parthenogenic chickens both the egg industry and the animal testing supplier companies would make me very rich.
Doing everything and anything to Jurassic Park myself a cute dino.
Continue that experiment where they raised bichir on land. Maybe try it on other species of fish.
All the good shit. I would live dissect humans to study what areas of their brains are responsible for which tasks. It's important the subject remains conscious, so it can report back what exactly is happening. I.e. figuring out the "neural API". I wouldn't do it for sadism -- sooner or later we have to develop transhumanism tech, and since brain uploads just results in p-zombies, we are forever shackled to at least our brains (which by the way includes the eyes. All depictions of the brain, and I mean all of them, you have ever seen are wrong).
You're a creep. Also the term you're looking for is vivisect
study the psychoactive effects of lsd on elephants but pocket all the acid and release the elephants into US national parks
A research on all types of animal to find out if, how and where they enjoy being pet.
Just some dumb useless research idea that some times pops in my mind.
Search rat tickling certificate
research ways to airdrop snakes into densely populated areas
find a way to make a stable population of mules
Very expensive test on how to get cute animals to live in harmony on a big picturesque property
This but on an island.
This, but also surgically modify them to look human.
Complete Mengele's research on homo sapiens