I am an ape expert. Ask me anything about apes and I will answer.

I am an ape expert. Ask me anything about apes and I will answer.

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Are there any apes that are worse at smelling than humans? Do humans generally have better vision than apes, or are we just worse at senses in general?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Humans went "good enough" on the info gathering to make more room for the info analysis.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Gorillas and other apes have very small penises and birth canals due to the lack of large infant cranial development. Humans uniquely have a large penis in proportion to their size. My question is, can a female ape take the average penis of a human male (5.2in, 4.5in circumference), and if so, what species of ape?

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          First, not the ape expert.
          Second, I doubt even the largest human peen is comparable to an infant ape skull. So I would imagine it's possible, but there would likely be a lot of discomfort.

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why is mimicry called "aping" something, but the common phrase is "monkey see, monkey do"?

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Do apes ever grow vestigial tails or are we the only gimped species that does that

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Can different breed monkeys procreate like dogs

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Can you tell us your favorite ape story?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >be dunston
      >check in

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    pongo play the bongo?

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Some individuals on the internet claim that chimpanzees are terrifying creatures with the ability to rip your arms off while they shit down your throat.
    Considering they're smaller than the average human and serious injuries caused by them tend to involve women and the elderly, I'm inclined to think that though they're potentially dangerous, a human being absolutely can beat a chimp in a fight.

    What do you think?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Some individuals on the internet claim that chimpanzees are terrifying creatures ...

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >gorilla

        lolno https://youtu.be/wy9cFUwZtgg

        >climbing
        pepecringe.jpg

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      lolno https://youtu.be/wy9cFUwZtgg

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why orangutan so freakishly strong and why do they have huge fangs if they live on a mostly vegetarian diet?

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    How do we return to monke

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >jerk off in front of everyone at the zoo
      >throw shit as a goof
      >ooo ooo aa aa

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why haven’t we tried to introduce great apes into other ecosystems to help preserve their species?
    >But muh effect on my the environment
    >But muh proper habitat
    I care about my fellow great apes than any gay rodents or stupid songbird that is only native a poopoo peepee region

    We should be letting them live in the islands off the East coast. South Carolina already has monkey island, lets give it pongo island

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Gets their eye sockets punctuated as soon they got introduced.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >Gets their eye sockets punctuated as soon they got introduced.

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Are black people apes??

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      No, apes are innocent.

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    What is the difference between your average orangutan and your average American?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Orangutans are the coolest and most peaceful creatures in the world.

      Legend has it that orangutans could speak but choose not to.

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Anon is an apeist

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Apes are the primary food sources of modern day predators, ecosystems with apes have higher predator biodiversity than ecosystems with just ungulate. Apes also have the reproductive success as most rodents.

    Why hasn’t humanity tried to domesticate apes for meat production? Apes are far more efficient than chicken or pigs when it comes to infinite meat production.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Voreaphile schizo spitting straight lies again

      Get eaten by a pitbull nerd

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    What is the most advanced tool an ape can use or pass on to another ape? Can they use spears?

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    does hellofresh use monky labor for coconut milk

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    should we eradicate the sumatran and bornean insects to preserve them?
    it seems like a worthwhile trade. more ape, less bug.

  18. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why do they commit so many crimes?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      purely socio-economic reasons

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Orang's are the biggest pedophiles. The things they do to little girls when they catch them. No prison time because they "don't know any better" - surrrre.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >Orang's are the biggest pedophiles.

          Wrong.

  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Can Orange Man and Lanky Man be friends in wilderness?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      yes they live in the same area and they don't harm each other unless the gibbon tries to steal shit

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    what kind of ape makes the best pet?
    I work 10 hours a day btw

  21. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Oo oo oo ah ah?

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    How the frick can humans and apes have an ancestor in common when they have extra chromosomes? How the frick does that happen? Is there any evidence of shit like this happening elsewhere in nature?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah you've got a couple of extra chromosomes yourself

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Humans have 46 chromosomes, whereas chimpanzee, gorilla, and orangutan have 48. This major karyotypic difference was caused by the fusion of two ancestral chromosomes to form human chromosome 2 and subsequent inactivation of one of the two original centromeres

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        is there proof?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        There is zero evidence that is what happened or if it's even possible in the first place

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Fusing and splitting chromosomes isn't uncommon, its a big driver of speciation.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      There is zero evidence that is what happened or if it's even possible in the first place

      A puma has 38 and an ocelot has 36, yet they can still interbreed and very clearly have a common ancestor. A puma is closer to an ocelot than it is to a lion, which also has 38 chromosomes. Chromosome count isn’t the be all end all

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >Chimp sperm injected in a human vegana.
        >Every attempt for a humanzee offspring has failed

        As you see anon, apes are so genetically different from humans that we can’t interbreed. We could only interbreed with other now extinct species within the homosexual genus.

        Why orangutan so freakishly strong and why do they have huge fangs if they live on a mostly vegetarian diet?

        >Why humans are so freakishly weak physically and why do they have blunt teeth if they are able to live on a partly carnivorous diet?

        Because of evolutionary adaptations that either help them survive or kept ancient traits that aren’t selected against. Which make respective species flexible when it comes to diet.
        Humans have tool use and complex social structures living entirely in diverse open environments or edges of forests, while orangutans are completely
        arboreal and specializes on a diet of vegetation found in its environment. The fangs are just for showcase.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          the only attempts i've ever heard of for "humanzees" are some shit from the soviet union, and you can't believe a damn thing that slavs says about shit like this because they lie pathologically.
          i don't believe there has ever been a legitimate attempt for it.

  23. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    why is orangutan skin bumpy like an orange

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >why is orangutan skin bumpy like an orange
      >orangutan
      >orang(e)
      it's obvious, silly

  24. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    what are your thoughts on the Orange People?

  25. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    do apes have a concept of time? could I condition an ape to do something everyday at approximately 9:00am unprompted without me being present?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      This sounds like the plot of an episode of Monk.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        quick rundown? I haven't seen the show but I know it's about a goofy British guy

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >br*tish
          no, you're thinking about Mr. Bean

  26. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why ape???

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Why not?

      https://i.imgur.com/aKzqAjG.jpg

      How do I beat the second level in Ape Escape?

      Have you tried being good at the game?

      do apes have a concept of time? could I condition an ape to do something everyday at approximately 9:00am unprompted without me being present?

      They have a concept of time, but they can't read time. They'd have a pretty vague idea of when they were supposed to do something, but their accuracy would vary pretty wildly from day to day

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        how ape

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Ape ape

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >Have you tried being good at the game?
        no 🙁

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Therein lies your issue my son. Become the apist

          https://i.imgur.com/WNQlPk2.png

          what are your thoughts on the Orange People?

          They are my favorite ape hands down. Big goofballs

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Which is which????

  27. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    How do I beat the second level in Ape Escape?

  28. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

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