hey guys I need help

hey guys I need help
got this live lobster at the supermarket the other day to keep as a pet but he's not doing too well rn
any tips?
is my tap water too alcaline maybe?

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Cool shrimp

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    where can i get a balhuticaris plush
    anomolocaris is great but i want the cambrian bnuuy

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Am I invited to the Anomolacaris boil, OP?

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's a funny post because the animal in the picture is called a lobster even though it clearly is not a lobster

    it's an inside joke because most people would not recognize that the animal in the picture is not a lobster.

    It displays the intelligence of the poster by both the humor and the inside knowledge. As well as the question about the water being too "alcaline," presumably meaning alkaline, a term the anon has heard in use regarding aquariums. However the anon doesn't realize that water for lobsters should be extremely alkaline, and it's impossible for it to be "too alcaline."

    this is also funny on a different level, because the poster is stupid and has a very average sense of humor while pretending to be smart and very witty.

    it is on this meta-level that the joke actually performs. It is funny when an unfunny idiot thinks they're being smart and funny but still fails.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >even though it clearly is not a lobster
      How do you know it's not a lobster? Why is this so "clear" to you?

      Sorry but I was a bit offended by this statement. It is not clear to me at all that the animal depicted is not a lobster. In fact it's not clear to me even if it is an animal at all.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      it means suck and frick

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Obviously his cage is too small. Buy a bigger aquarium.

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    which new sort of degeneracy is this poor sea creature a symbol for

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      guess

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        STD positive movement, bug chasing, etc

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        penis splitting

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      none
      he's just cool

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I would be loath to hear of ediacarans being coopted

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          over 500 million years separate radiodonts and man-made horrors they'll be alright
          just wanted a cool plushiemal for my lil sis

          anomalocaris says chud rights

          being the first recorded animal to evolve into the role of apex predator to oppress lesser creatures he's possibly the founder of all chuddery

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            billions of trilobites must die
            and dont (you) me saying UM ASCHKULLY THEY DONT EAT TRILOBITES SCOYENCE SAYS TH...go frick yourselves, same people say T-Rex isn't an alpha male based predator who only ate other carnivores after defeating them in 1v1 honorable combat.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >Bicknell et al. (2023) examined the frontal appendages of Anomalocaris, suggesting it was an active nektonic apex predator. >Postured with the frontal appendages outstretched, Anomalocaris would have been able to swim with maximized speed, similar to modern predatory water bugs. Its eyes would be suitable to hunt prey in well-lit waters.
              Whilst the trilobite loss is sad, it's still an apex predator, just in a different medium.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Ignored.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Dumbass, it says right there that it's still an APEX predator. Nothing's changed.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nothing has changed because I am ignoring all the changes. Dumbass.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nothing has changed because I am ignoring all the changes. Dumbass.

                Based decider of truth.

                It doesn't get much more degenerate than that.

                How

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >one guy did a "study" and came out with an opinion that is completely unfalsifiable
                Trash can.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >doesn't know how biomechanical models can be falsified
                >doesn't know that animals do all things they're biomechanically capable of and often enough a few things they're not mechanically capable of.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      anomalocaris says chud rights

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        https://i.imgur.com/335STtt.jpeg

        over 500 million years separate radiodonts and man-made horrors they'll be alright
        just wanted a cool plushiemal for my lil sis
        [...]
        being the first recorded animal to evolve into the role of apex predator to oppress lesser creatures he's possibly the founder of all chuddery

        billions of trilobites must die
        and dont (you) me saying UM ASCHKULLY THEY DONT EAT TRILOBITES SCOYENCE SAYS TH...go frick yourselves, same people say T-Rex isn't an alpha male based predator who only ate other carnivores after defeating them in 1v1 honorable combat.

        wow he just keeps getting cooler…

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Attack on Titan

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        He just keeps moving forward.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        shitty ending but at least he was there to make it better 🙂

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It doesn't get much more degenerate than that.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      My dick

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        you split your dick? how'd it turn out?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          better than you’d expect

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            post pics, no homo

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