>20 meters distance

>20 meters distance

Frick off and frick right off.

When will people stop treating Animals like a House of Cards?

A Conspiracy Theorist Is Talking Shirt $21.68

Tip Your Landlord Shirt $21.68

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    20 m means that you're close enough to see them but far enough away that they don't change their behavior i.e. react to your presence

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Redditors are gay

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I stopped seeing reddit everywhere when I got off that site anon

      you should try it too

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    But aren't seals the doggos of the sea?

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    One of my scuba diving buddies had a seal swim up to him and just start chewing on his head. He wasn't even doing anything and had to get stitches in multiple places.

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I think op should go to a beach and pet a seal, some people don't learn things when they're told about them and they need to learn via firsthand experience. Go ahead op it'll be fine.

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    When I was a wee lad in Denmark the harbor seals would show up at our beach in Summer and play with us. We could pet them and swim with them and feed them herrings (fishing village).
    They really are the dogs of the sea.
    I never see them there anymore.

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    OP is a massive moron, so does everyone agreeing with him.
    You don't get close to the seals because it stresses them out. It causes several massive problems, including :
    -stampede, which could get pups accidentally killed
    -mothers abandoning the pups out of fear
    -seals eating rocks out of stress, which cause stomach damage that can kill them in the long run

    Wild animals are very vulnerable to human moronation.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      If theyre so moronic and scared of everything, maybe they dont deserve to exist

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Anglos should be kept 20 meters away from any living organim

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Especially the females

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >seals eating rocks out of stress
      Sounds like the seals are just as moronic as OP, they deserve each other.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Oh man imagine if seal predators existed in the wild, they would be so fricked. Luckily nature is a peaceful safe haven for animals to relax and never feel threatened enough to kill themselves.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        they rest on beaches because they usually don't have to deal with sharks, orcas, bears and other sufficiently large land carnivores and, hopefully, anglos there

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Ah I think I get it, so I'm diving it'll be fine for me to go near them because they'll be READY to fight as they're in the water.

          The things you learn on Wauf. Please confirm that you're giving me permission because I don't want to it be my fault if they eat rocks afterwards.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            I definitely think you should do the field research to prove your hypothesis.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              Noo my delicate Seal Baby. I was only going to pick up my had, promise I wasn't going to walk past you. Please don't eat Rocks baby.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Less talking, more getting in the water and messing with seals.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                I see you've changed your tune a bit, moron. So the restriction is for my safety now.

                I guess you thought about how dumb you sounded protecting your babies. At least you're learning young fella.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >so I'm diving it'll be fine for me to go near them because they'll be READY to fight as they're in the water
            Sure but you might get eaten

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              Ok?

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    It used to be 10m LMAO they're taking the piss
    >t. 10m chad
    Gotta see the seals and sea lions in detail, but not disturb them. 20 gorillian metre homosexuals can FRICK OFF

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Honestly approaching them should be encouraged. If they get enraged and you cant outrun them, well, that's darwinism for ya

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >Frick off, I'll get as close as I wan- ACK

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I wonder what penguin meat tastes like?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Literally moronic flightless birds, cant be that hard to hunt one. Go for it.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Not all of us are as weak and useless as penguins buddy. Some of us have actual MUSCLE MASS but I guess soi drinking californians wouldn't understand that.

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Anglos shouldn't be allowed near animals

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    *mauls you*

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Swiggity swingers, I'm coming for your fingers

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    i wish you would die on a beach
    or anywhere

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >woooow how was I supposed to know?!

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Skyrim giant physics are real?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      No sympathy for femoids

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Have you ever been to disneyland?

    fact is one butthole chasing the seals isn't going to do much harm
    1.5 million buttholes a day chasing the seals is going to kill them

    and if one butthole in america does something, all the other buttholes want to do it too.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      also if OP doesn't know how buttholes ruin everything,
      He is that butthole.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The only answer so far that makes sense. Fair enough, even if I think nature should be unsheltered.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        most of California doesn't have signs on the beaches regarding the pinnipeds. You're not supposed to approach them but they're also pretty hard to avoid. My guess is they're only sheltered in places where tourists have been a problem in the past, or people got hurt fricking with them.
        Most people just ignore them and move on down the beach.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >nature should be unsheltered
        If nature was unsheltered there would be no more nature. Every mountain would be a giant quarry, every lake would be a dump site, every woodland would be paved over, every animal would be collected or killed.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          no because some private companies/individuals would want to keep their private wilderness land untouched.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            lasts about 30 years at best. Then that person dies or that company gets new owners and managers and they do what anyone that wants make money does.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            That would be sheltering it now wouldn’t it

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              I assumed sheltered meant sheltered by a governing entity. If nature is 100% unsheltered by anyone, then nothing else is. So even private property is unsheltered , not by police, not by private guards, and not by the property owners themselves. It is an impossible scenario that can't even exist in a semi realistic fictional universe.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >be industrialist
            >dump mass amounts of toxic pollution into river
            >sorry about your downstream nature reserve bro
            That's only one example. How in the frick could you even post that without actually knowing, or even thinking about, what happens when you let people do whatever the frick they want to nature? It would take half a second to think of a million reasons why that's a bad idea. Same with people approaching animals. It isn't just for your own safety, it's to provide the animals a little bit of peace from the buttholes like you that would walk up to them and scare them away from their natural habitat, ruining the chance for everyone else to see them and harming them for no reason other than being a nosey fricking prick.

            I refuse to believe you're over 18.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              Didn't read. Cry more. have a nice day.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >fact is one butthole chasing the seals isn't going to do much harm

      https://www.newsweek.com/three-seal-pups-three-days-die-after-beachgoers-wont-leave-them-alone-1477577

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >exception that proves the rule

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Only some people are smart and special enough to be allowed to get close to and disturb the seals. Peasants can fuk off.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Yes that is objectively correct.

      How underage are you morons to not understand that every single one of these "don't wash chicken before you cook it" and "don't mess with animals you don't know" are all made as moron-protection policies and rules?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        >nobody got sick from chicken washing ever, but you better not do it!
        this is the kind of shit that gradually trained the common person for lockdowns

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Why the frick do you want to wash chicken in the first place?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            when i make poached chicken for hainanese chicken rice, i like to exfoliate the chicken with salt first. Then rinse. Gets the skin nice and clean.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            why do you want extra bacteriotoxins in your food?

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              Because I have a functioning immune system. Such is life when you are not more inbred than a show cat.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Eat off the floor then.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                immune system can't protect against toxins produced by bacteria.

                interesting idea though. Modern mithridatism

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            Not that anon, but I usually rinse meat off before I cook it because of shit that gets on it in the packaging plant. Not even bacteria but metal shavings from the blade.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Kinda like that myth that birds will abandon chicks if you touch them. It was likely made up to discourage people from kidnapping perfectly fine fledgelings thinking they can't fly because they were injured when in reality they are just learning to fly

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          I dunno, I think a lot of murrican folklore arose without motive or reason. Mostly from appalachian grandmas that didn't know shit about nature but wanted some good mysterious rules to hand out anyways.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            nah that's got filthy hippie and duplicitous academic wanker all over it. appalachian granny would tell you critters do things how they do things and just you leave it be and it'll either figure it out or it won't.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              pretty sure that one is a lot older than either hippies or giving a frick about the environment.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                it actually got me curious and i've been looking for some mention of its origin. earliest documented note made of it. whatever. not finding much so far.
                https://www.gutenberg.org/files/59598/59598-h/59598-h.htm
                found this though which is pretty interesting in its own right and points toward lots more sources to look at in its bibliography

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                looks interesting....

                All I have is personal experience. I'm fairly old, 50 now. My parents and grandparents both repeated the old "smell of your hands" tripe to us and they also told us to go out and shoot some birds with our slingshots and bb guns when we were bored. Or stray cats. Or whatever. Also they all kept outdoor cats that killed birds daily.

                I think the concern for the health and wellbeing of birds is an extremely new thing. When I was a kid you might have gotten locked up for suggesting something crazy like bird lives matter. Now you might get locked up for saying the opposite. Anons don't understand how much things have changed just in their parent's lifetimes.
                Not that old myth though, it's still going strong whether people care about birds or not.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >Anons don't understand how much things have changed just in their parent's lifetimes.
                putting it mildly, yeah. easy enough to get a basic grasp of the more broad strokes if you've any interest in finding out but the details, the minutiae of day to day, the doings and attitudes and beliefs that made up the people themselves and the fabric of their lives... all the stuff that matters and connects us to our roots is hazy at best. really gotta hear it from those who lived it if you want it brought into focus. my grandparents have all passed now but my grandma always made it a point to tell me about how things have changed and what they used to be like. parents do the same but with them it's moreso if i happen to ask rather than just because. this weird sense of doom and ruin tends to accompany my thoughts these days whenever i wonder how much of the conventional wisdom type stuff has been lost. posts like yours are nice to read, thanks for that. think more has changed for the worse or for the better overall?

                probably a better reason for the myth is wild birds are crawling with lice, something anyone that's ever handled one probably knows.

                sound line of thinking. preventing the kids from bringing in hitchhikers would've been enough of a motivating factor all by itself.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >think more has changed for the worse or for the better overall?
                overall better, but much more complex. I grew up in a much simpler america. Not nicer, but simpler.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                probably a better reason for the myth is wild birds are crawling with lice, something anyone that's ever handled one probably knows.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          I dunno, I think a lot of murrican folklore arose without motive or reason. Mostly from appalachian grandmas that didn't know shit about nature but wanted some good mysterious rules to hand out anyways.

          I mean when I was a kid nobody cared if you killed or kidnapped birds. That wasn't a concern and it certainly wasn't enough of a concern to make up myths to stop you.

          Probably most boomers took a babby bird or squirrel to school for show and tell at some point. Nobody freaked out because nobody cared. Those birbs were put on earth by god for little timmy to snag and put in a shoebox.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      can seals get corona?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I envy them, I wish I worked with Animals.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah you and every other ‘omg I wanna work with animals xD’ moron who think that the jobs are all about touching and playing with animals or being in their general vicinity.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Who hurt you

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            life and being old in general.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          You absolute weirdo, I told you I just want to touch them and have no interest in biology?

          Please get Lobotomy quick.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >omg i love watching videos of animals on youtube im such a biology nerd xD

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              What would even count as liking something for you? Reading academic journals?
              Biology was a very common major at my university. I wasn't one, but don't you think they all saw a documentary or went to the aquarium as children and thought "cool, I want to learn about this" and then go on to get serious academic knowledge? You're being uppity for nothing.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      How do I join the Federal Bureau of Goofing with Seal Flippers

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Be a certain kind of person

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >”You need a license to touch nature” -~~*Them*~~

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    please go walk between a bear and her cub
    do it now

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Oh shit they're little Bears, I thought I posted the Seal screenshot. I'll go look for that one now.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Seals basically are little bears. They're gigantic, strong, and predators.

        20m is a little much, but the whole "don't get between it and its pup/the sea" is smart. Not for the seal's benefit, but for yours.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          You do realise the wildlife notices here are for the Animals sake?

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            No they're pitched that way because people respond better than to "do it to not die".

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              So if I walk across the barrier everybody will act like gays and be upset with me because they're worried about me?

              I don't know where you're from but its definitely not the same here.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                America makes it illegal to drive without seatbelts and people still do it even though it takes 1 second and is in every single car for free. No one really cares about you, but unnecessary deaths are an economic drain of resources, even if you’re worthless.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Live free or die

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                No, people will be gays because you broke a rule and it makes them feel superior. The fact they think it's to help the animals just adds to that feeling of superiority. See: mask mandates.

                The rule is posted as intended protect the animals because it's a more effective deterrent than saying it's to protect you, because people like you think that seals aren't potentially deadly and will be more likely to ignore a "for your own safety" warning.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                it actually is to protect the animals. Causing a stampede when they have pups that can't run is just going to kill the pups. Even if it doesn't, most wild animals live on a slim enough diet that any extra exercise has the potential to kill them over time.

                nobody cares if you get hurt on the beach. Not like there's signs there saying to stay off the rocks or avoid the water, both of which kill far more people every year than seals could. If seals kill you it's one less idiot to worry about. But we don't need idiots killing seals.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Lifeguards at beaches will absolutely yell at people who get too close to rocky areas.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                yep, but again, the vast majority of the California coast doesn't have lifeguards.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                The beaches do. the places most people go and potentially get hurt do.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >the places most people go and potentially get hurt do.
                right again. Nobody cares if you die on the california coast, they just don't want to get sued by your family.

                if they actually cared, you wouldn't be allowed to go to all those places that don't have lifeguards.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                You arent.
                Most of those places would be trespassing.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >Most of those places would be trespassing.
                if that's what you want to believe.

                but in real life, nobody owns the beaches in california, and private property owners are required to build beach access for the public.

                and most of the coast doesn't have life guards.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >nobody owns the beaches in california
                The state owns the beaches.
                https://www.coastal.ca.gov/#http://www.coastal.ca.gov
                >private property owners are required to build beach access for the public
                And yet.
                >Homeowners have employed several tactics to try to keep their beachfront properties private. A recent example of a case in Malibu involved a property owner charging people $40 to walk on the beach, and banning surfing unless the person was a resident or a friend of a resident. Others have blocked public walkways down to the shore with signs warning visitors to “keep off” or not to “trespass”.
                >Noaki Schwartz, a commission employee, was asked to do some reconnaissance following a stream of formal complaints from the public, including tourists and locals, about being denied access to areas along Escondido beach.
                >She had been on the beach just a few minutes when a tall, uniformed security guard approached. He told Schwartz she was trespassing on private property and “threatened” her with a $1,500 fine and a court citation if she didn’t leave.
                But you keep believing what you want.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >The state owns the beaches.
                yes
                not private citizens.
                the state

                >gives a bunch of examples of landowners trying to deny access and getting sued
                you sure showed me

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >no one owns the beach
                >I mean someone obviously does
                You got wrecked.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >state property is private property
                >the state is a person
                yes, you totally "wrecked" me

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Easterners get mixed up about that because there's lots of private beaches on the East Coast.

                but on the West Coast and Hawaii I don't think there's a single inch of private beach aside from a few small chunks on military bases and indian reservations.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Iucky bastards. I got hounded off of a private beach once, pretentious fricks weren't even using it and it was all rocks anyway.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                You're definitely right about me, I wouldn't see much danger and go and give one a nice head run which will make my day.

                I'll take your word for it.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                they bite. A lot.

                In the US at least if you get hurt by nature that's your own problem though. An ER trip for a seal bite costs more than you make in a year so we leave it up to people to make their own choices in most cases.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                I didn't think they bite, it would be hilarious to get bitten by one, hooef not too hard. They can't even walk so you'd probably deserve it if you did manage to let one hurt you kek.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Their bite isn't much worse than a dog, but the bacteria in their mouths is particularly foul.

                https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seal_finger

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Holy shit! I had no idea, I guess I'm very wrong. Good thing I read this before fricking around with them.

                They can move 15-20mph on land, not a human sprint but not far below. And smaller seals are still 300+ lbs of muscle and fat.

                Still slow but surprisingly fast.

                A lot to be learned in this thread.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                They can move 15-20mph on land, not a human sprint but not far below. And smaller seals are still 300+ lbs of muscle and fat.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Their bite isn't much worse than a dog, but the bacteria in their mouths is particularly foul.

                https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seal_finger

                >Their bite isn't much worse than a dog
                For the smaller ones at least. The larger ones are literally just bears with flippers with a bite to match. People don’t even seem to see steller’s sea lions or leopard seals as a threat and will try touch them

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                yeah makes me laugh
                leopard seals are really bitey and sea lions are just aggressive bastards.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Lmao you got your ass kicked by a fricking seal of all things and now you're running around coping trying to convince everyone that "N-no they're actually super dangerous guise" when the reality is that you're a little pussy b***h with too much estrogen. Maybe your daddy should have beat your little homosexual ass more, maybe then you'd be an actual man and wouldn't get your ass kicked by these fat fricks. Pathetic

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                >t. Canadian

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Bravo, you are one of the least intelligent people I have met this month. You just fail to analyze human society/behaviour.
                I ask you: who do you think pushes for such warning signs to be erected? *What* related to wild animals x human encounters lives in *whose* heads rent-free? Can you imagine an answer?
                The answer is: wildlife protection. Wildlife protection is the thing that actually occupies people's minds, passions, and efforts. No one cares if a drunk fratboy dives into a pack of seals like its mosh pit, then gets crushed. Who is the advocate to prevent that? There are no special interest groups for moron protection. Of course moron protection happens, but it's just soulless managerial bureaucracy, it is not the energy behind most such measures so that wild animals can be left alone (only "supposedly" in your mind due to psychological tricks -- frick off).

                I knew you Americans are a hyper-sheltered, nannied bunch that won't even let their 12 year old kids walk to school alone, let alone go anywhere else. At least keep the animals out of your golem shenanigans.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Thanks I knew that couldn't have been right. Why would they go through all the effort.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                No the will act like gays because you didn't do what the guberment said to do and that means you are an evil chud. Intelligent people can discern the separation between their own morals/critical thinking and the authority's mandate rules. The rest are well, like these monkeys
                https://richcoward.com/5-monkeys-experiment/#:~:text=Every%20time%20a%20monkey%20tried%20to%20climb%20the,Soon%2C%20no%20monkey%20dared%20go%20up%20the%20ladder.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                This is totally it, I don't know how I didn't realise it myself. This is life.

                It's crazy how people become this way.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Huh.
                When exactly did they do this experiment?
                Because it certainly isn't a bullshit story dressed up as science.

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